I just took on a new intern in my office a few months back, and I think it's fair to say that this young man is the closest thing to an alien I've ever met. No joke. If he came in tomorrow, ripped off his face like Edgar did in MIB, and told me he was from the Nexxulon Galaxy here to study human culture, I wouldn't flinch. I'd ask him how the weather was there and if they were the mean kind of aliens like "Independence Day" or the nice kind of aliens, like from"Close Encounters" and that'd be about it.
After two months, here's what I know about this 26 year old, communications major, intern:
He doesn't know what a Republican or Democrat is. Furthermore, he doesn't know what/how senators, representatives or any other level of government function.
He doesn't watch movies, TV, or football but is eerily fascinated with the Celtics.
He does not have an email address or a home computer. In fact, it wasn't until August that he got his first cell phone.
He was unaware of the oil spill, trapped minors, or any other news story of the past year until he began interning here and was forced to hear news.
He did not know what Facebook or Twitter were until I told him in late September of this year. Still doesn't have one or completely understand why they exist.
He has no desire to go to Las Vegas, drink, gamble, or move from his couch unless it is to play basketball, work, or eat Micky D's. His girlfriend wants to do the opposite.
He has a girlfriend. Somehow he has a girlfriend.
It's been unequivocally the most bizarre two months I've ever spent with somebody. I swear to god a metor could destroy half the continental U.S. and he would still drive here for noon and say "You see that traffic outside? That's crazy, man. What's going on out there?" How could a 26 year old be so illiterate to the world?! At first, I found this predictably frustrating seeing as I work solely with computers and news...but after a while it was almost like interviewing a 26 year old from 1955, not 2010. The conversations became more poignant and I suddenly felt like I was showing the preverbial caveman what the world had become low these past 2000+ years. His questions slowly went from insultingly simple, to unintentionally astute observances about our society's dependency on information.
Why should he know how every level of government works? He enacts his right to not vote due to lack of opinion and knowledge and therefore is doing the responsible thing according to everybody else.
Why should he have an email or cell phone? He lives at home, has a land line, and rarely goes out in the first place. He likes his job and his lot in life so why attempt to alter it all the time? If he had the internet, he'd only be forcefully exposed to information he is neither seeking out nor wanting, which everybody tries to do everyday.
Why does he need to know about news anyway? He doesn't live in New Orleans, so he ain't getting drowned. Hearing about some poor bastard getting shot down in the south end of his hometown doesn't decrease his chances of getting popped in his car, so why worry himself?
His explanations are so stupidly simple, they start making sense after a while. I'm constantly questioning our reliance on media and information as a whole...and then here comes this person that literally is a walking example of what would happen if we suddenly just "shut off" in 2010. The answer is we would be a hell of a lot less world weary and socially aware, but otherwise still capable of putting on clothes and not pooping in public. The world would keep spinning, but the questions would go away. That's both a bad thing (knowing why your paycheck is being cut would be a good slice of FYI) and a good thing (wouldn't know Ashton Kutcher or Twitter to save his life. Something I think we can all agree would be awesome).
The Intern is now really feeling the pressure's of the modern world and is very awkwardly being bombarded left and right to "get with it." My relationship with him is now duplicating the storyboard of "Avatar." At first, I was totally on board with making this kid change his ways, but after time and a little perspective, I'm standing in front of him pleading with everyone else to stop spoiling his perspective on things and to just let him live in peace!
Leave him alone! He's in his natural state and you're going to contaminate him!
Is is possible to keep living like he has been his whole life? Is it socially responsible? Don't we as humans owe it to our species to evolve and embrace what is "new" and "better" for us? By locking ourselves out from all pop culture, information and news do you become dumber or just less informed? Is there even a difference?
Let's put this kid behind glass and find out.
